In line at Safeway when the patron behind me flaunted his true colors in a somewhat less than obvious (to him) but still very egregious manner.
In our local store, the Duvall, Washington store to be precise, some troop of Boy/Girl Scouts/Brownies/Youth Group/Young Taxidermists what-have-you's went through the store and meticulously taped coupons on various items. I can see the poor things, cooped up in a sweatshop (or what passes for one in Carnation/Duvall--A dairy) cutting out coupon after coupon to take to the Safeway and tape to containers of oil, Bisquick, and any manner of other goods.
When said item is brought to the counter, the clerk asks "Do you wish to donate, or use the coupon?" I figure I didn't come in with it, and someone put in some hard work to get it there...Ok so actually I feel the eyes of the clerk looking down her crooked, and warted green nose with a look of contempt while all the shame of childhood, buried thinly behind a glass ego, wells up inside me and I scream "Donate! Donate! What ELSE would I do?!?! DONATE!"
Not so the patron behind me. As he hefts his bag of dog food unto the scanner and the question is asked "Would you like to donate, or use the coupon?" the stammered answer belies the true motives of his heart.
"I, er, uh....I uh... I think THIS TIME, I'll use it."
Yeah right buddy. Like anyone of us think that you actually DONATED last time.
Around the same time, I heard a thousand scouts cry out with the pain of paper cuts. A thousand cuts, for the cash value of less that 1/100 of a cent. A thousand cries for 35 cents off...
blast.
I wonder what the rate of return is on these things. Maybe 80% donated? If we knew what the rate was, would it be a good measure of the "cheapness" quotient of your neighborhood?
ReplyDeleteIs the donate/use ratio lower in, say, Compton than it is in, say, Medina (hometown of Mr. Gates)? What would Bill Gates do when confronted with this same issue? Can you see Billy picking up a tube of Crest with a coupon attached, then responding, "I guess I'll use it this time"? I wouldn't be surprised. Mr. Gates was recently spotted at a movie theater with some candy brought in from home!